I left from this group on 20.06.2007 for concentrating more onkalingatamil links with extensive fieldworks and also my speeches with differnt forums infront of reputed scholors.
i am residing at orissa since 1989 and known to all.
My entire project, i am doing on my own wishes, not funded by ICHR for money. i am not working on salery for serving to the soceity.
Engineering profession, i was happily with money and respect. but last 6 years with heavy comments still i sustain on what basics?
please think
Being away from 1200 km from chennai , wanted to do some think to my mother state from the place of my living.
you ask my legs , it will tell the pain you ask my ears it will spell the scoldings through my mouth you ask my family members,they will tell their sufferings count less people , i met on this work count less time i sit on the library and in front of computers for references
even institutions are asking research people to submit their references and foot notes to accept the geniune of the article.
we are tracing the important events from the past only.
no one is better in front of god.
i am back again
but as a silence member hence forth will not tell any thing about my work and reference materials to the members becasue of the pain.
I sat alone another day. The world was moving all around me, but it seemed as if my life was in a standstill. The doctors say its anxiety. Everyone thinks anxiety means nervousness or fear, but it is deeper than that. Anxiety holds you prisoner. You can't leave your house.
The doorbell rings but I can't answer. There is too much fear inside. You can't answer the phone.
"Telephone for you!" my family yells. I tell them to say that I will call back, but I won't. You can't eat.
No, not me. The anxiety even controls that. All the pain rushes back up with every little thing I eat. You can't go out.
Everyone walking around me, but I can't move, the apprehension paralyzes me. Everyone says, "Be brave. You can do it. You'll make it out of this." But sometimes I wonder if I will. I try to combat it all, but if I attempt to do anything, it all starts over again.
My heart beats faster and faster. I can feel it in my chest.
Beads of sweat Racing Falling Running down my forehead. All the thoughts swarm in my brain. The fear picks up. It is unbearable. I'm so frightened, but I don't know what of. The paranoia sweeps over my body like a giant wave. Every day I have to fight what seems to be a losing battle. But then . . . I look outside. I see the colors. I see the life. I see spirit. I know I can do this.
Hope pray win
=========================================== WORDS
There are words in life to inspire us, Words that bring comfort and care; Encouraging words to a friend When they're in the depth of despair.
There are words between two lovers Declaring their love for each other; But sometimes we speak harsh words Inflicting pain on another.
Words that are chosen wisely Which we speak in a gentle tone, Are those that come from our heart And with them true kindness is shown
I am glad you are back, but don't be a silent member; you have been active and contributed a lot; please continue.
It is unfortunate that you were blamed without support data. The bane of internet is any one can make such wild accusation anonymously and throw dirt. The blessing is, it is equally easy to clear all the issues and wash away the mud. On the plus side, all the friends come to your help.
Your contributions on the early kalinga-tamil links are refreshing and welcome.